"Brave" by Sara Bareilles

Music touches my soul.  I listen to new songs and am instantly transported to a different place.  I listen to the words and every now and again a song touches my soul.  My sister always was the same way.  There were countless times when she would call me and say... HEY listen to THIS song.  :)  

Well, yesterday I was at work and I always have my pandora going.  An acapella rendition of the below song came on and I fell in love.  I shazam'd it so that I could buy it off of Itunes.  

Then I listened to the words.  And I listened again.  And I sent it to my best friend.  And I let the words seep into my soul where they're going to hibernate.  Maybe one day I can be brave.  

You can be amazing

You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug

You can be the outcast

Or be the backlash of somebody’s lack of love

Or you can start speaking up

Nothing’s gonna hurt you the way that words do

When they settle ‘neath your skin

Kept on the inside and no sunlight

Sometimes a shadow wins

But I wonder what would happen if you

Say what you wanna say

And let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

With what you want to say

And let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I wanna see you be brave

Everybody’s been there,

Everybody’s been stared down by the enemy

Fallen for the fear

And done some disappearing,

Bow down to the mighty

Don’t run, stop holding your tongue

Maybe there’s a way out of the cage where you live

Maybe one of these days you can let the light in

Show me how big your brave is

Say what you wanna say

And let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

With what you want to say

And let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

And since your history of silence

Won’t do you any good,

Did you think it would?

Let your words be anything but empty

Why don’t you tell them the truth?

Say what you wanna say

And let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

With what you want to say

And let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I wanna see you be brave

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

See you be brave

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see youjjj

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

I just wanna see you

Perfect Storm

So I started my new paleo challenge yesterday.

I kid I kid.  :)

But I did start this new way of life where I eat much cleaner food... nothing processed.  And for the next 60 days I eat no dairy or sugar.  And possibly beyond...  but for now, I am committing to the next 60 days. 

The first week is done and I am ok.  I made it.  Once I got through the first couple of days, I did truly feel better than I've felt in a very long time.  I have more energy.  I am stronger.

I still miss my coffee creamer and my wine.   I may always miss my creamer and my wine.  But... I feel better. 

The first monday I worked out at my usual time of 5:00 am.  I ate well.
I got into an accident.  Someone rear ended me on the way to my therapist.  I know... I know... how this century I am.  :)   I got home from work and went for a run.  It was hot.  It was VERY hot.  I got home and it took me an hour just to cool off enough to go to bed. 

I woke up at 12:00 midnight with a migraine.  I usually get a warning sign with my vision going funny...  but when you're asleep... well, there's no warning.  And it was a BAD one.  I took two excedrin migraine's and it wasn't putting a dent into it.  It took a HOT foot bath with dry mustard and when it cooled I was able to go back to bed and the headache abated. 

But that was truly my only snafu with the new diet.  :) 

Week one down and 7 more to go.  I feel great.  Let's keep this going. 

Crossfit, clean eating, paleo, blah blah blah

I think I have always exercised.  I can't remember a time when I didn't do some form of exercise... and usually gung ho, balls to the wall, all in.  Then I fall out. 

I have always battled with my weight.  I have a fat head.  When I look into the mirror, I see a fat person. 

I started crossfit about 8 weeks ago and I love it.  It's different every day and the people are so encouraging.  I have seen real results as far as my strength goes but it is still like you dipped me in a vat of fat. 

Tomorrow, my box (what they call the gym in crossfit) is starting a paleo challenge.  Paleo is short for Paleolithic and basically means if we can hunt it, gather it, or pick it we can eat it.  Lean meats, vegetables, fruits, nuts.  No dairy, no wine, no creamer, ugh. 

I have a partner, Stacie and we gather our points together.  There are prizes and a cash reward.  But the biggest reward will be seeing results and feeling better. 

I have people in my life who are a little less than encouraging.  As in...  "I just don't agree with diets that have a name.  I know you and as soon as it's over, you'll go back to where you are.  Just eat chicken and steamed vegetables and don't drink." 

Another person who IS encouraging but says rather stupid things... "you just need to lose weight.  Stop snacking and just don't eat as much. " 

So tomorrow...  I start this challenge.  I start it for ME.  I will prove this to me and I will make the lifestyle change to make it last.